Free Your Mind from fear of rejection
Free Your Mind for greater creativity
Free Your Mind to sell more widgets
Free Your Mind to develop powerful relationships
Free Your Mind to create new opportunities
Free Your Mind and improve your health 

FREE YOUR MIND AND IMAGINE THE POSSIBILITIES

Success and happiness are different for each of us.  That is why when my clients say, “I want to be more successful.”  I ask, “What is success for you?”  Success isn’t about things, accomplishments or cash flow.  I believe each of us is looking for a feeling inside that we associate the words happiness and success with.

What is that feeling?  In the United States and throughout the world, millions have fought for it.  Millions have died for it.

Freedom.

In a physical sense, most of us are free.  In an emotional or psychological sense, however, an estimated 80% of the population puts themselves into self-imposed cells on a regular basis.   Through the thinking process we forfeit our freedom of choice in making important life decisions.  Some of us even forfeit our choice to the point of seeing our options in life as limited; sometimes as hopeless.

Free will.

That’s what we human beings have been blessed with.  The ability to consciously examine our conscious thoughts allows us to choose how we react in any given situation.  Throughout life, we learn to react.  We learn that by acting in a certain way, we will achieve a certain result.

Often the result we opt for is safety.  In some instances, safety is necessary to preserve our life in a physical sense.  However, for many of us the desire for what we perceive to be safety paralyzes our ability to exercise our free will.  The emotional scars of the past live our life in the present.  “That hurt me in the past, so I will not take that chance again.”

The cost of this reactive thinking is we stay stuck in jobs we hate, we don’t pursue the relationships we want, and we develop low levels of self-esteem and self-confidence.  In short, we sell ourselves short with our thinking.  We severely hamper our ability to manifest what we want in our life because we create long lists of “why” we should not even “try.”

Phooey!

So how do I coach my clients out of this?  How can you stop this thinking in your own life?

It’s more than I can cover in depth in this article, but I’ll give you a few highlights from my course Free Your Mind.

First, tell the truth.  When we experience emotions like fear, jealousy, overwhelm and failure, we have chosen thinking that puts us in the smallest of jail cells.  These emotions completely paralyze our freedom of choice.  The good news?  These emotions are all founded in mistruths.  Fear doesn’t exist.  You can’t put it in a Tupperware container and give it to a neighbor.  We make it up.  And, we have the ability to be completely at choice as to whether and/or how we experience these emotions or not. 

Second, go for the result.  When we experience emotions such as anger, antagonism or insult, we are seeking to be right in a situation rather than going for the result we want.  A perfect example?  The old saying, “The customer is always right.”  Why?  Because the purpose of the business is to make money and/or be of service – that’s the result the wise businessperson seeks.  It isn’t to win an argument and prove how knowledgeable we are.

Third, maintain your freedom of choice.  When we experience the emotions of frustration and confusion, we need to recognize we have a choice and make it.  Continuing to run straight ahead into a brick wall is futile.  Climb over it, under it, or around it.  Heck, you can even blow it up!  Just recognize when you are frustrated that you have a choice.  When you’re confused, know your values and purpose and make a choice based upon them.

And fourth, keep your agreements.  All relationships exist out of agreements.  That means your relationships with others as well as your self.   Not keeping our agreements creates feelings of guilt, embarrassment and obligation.  The trick with agreements is that some of them we are conscious of and some we are not.   My coaching helps my clients recognize the agreements they’re not conscious of.  Not keeping our agreements inevitably takes us into feelings of fear and overwhelm.     

Whenever we do not act with complete integrity, we are forfeiting a portion of our ability to choose.  And when we do not exercise that ability, we are not living a truly free and empowered life.   This article has only just touched the tip of the concepts I teach in my telecourse, Free Your Mind.  This powerful two-week course will free your thinking, expand the opportunities you see in your life, and give you the basic tools you need to take action in spite of your minds chatter.  I believe this course is a powerful piece of work that can transform your life and dramatically improve your professional results.

The course will be delivered to you daily via e-mail and supported with two follow-up group coaching calls.  Individual coaching on the principles is also available. 

Take Charge of your future!

Best wishes, John R. Barker

© John R. Barker and Coaching Works, Inc. 2000

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